--- title: "Wheelchair Users: What to Do When People Stare" description: People with spinal cord injuries deal with not only their injuries but also the side effect of people staring. Learn how one SCI survivor deals with starers. image: https://www.spinalcord.com/hubfs/Blog%20Images/wheelchair%20users%20blog%20image.png --- [![spinalcord logo desktop](https://www.spinalcord.com/hubfs/Logos/spinal-cord_png.png) ![spinalcord logo mobile](https://www.spinalcord.com/hubfs/Logos/spinal-cord-white_png.png) ](https://www.spinalcord.com/) MENU ** ![spinal cord logo slide out mobile](https://www.spinalcord.com/hubfs/Logos/spinal-cord_png.png) ** [![Dale Swope](https://www.spinalcord.com/hs-fs/hubfs/dale-img-min.jpg?width=100&name=dale-img-min.jpg) The Purpose Behind Spinalcord.com ** Play Dale Swope's Story ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C1kPXDw_CQU) [For Advice Call: (877) 336-7192 ](tel:8773367192) ![Spinalcord Logo](https://www.spinalcord.com/hubfs/Logos/spinal-cord-logo-icon-svg.svg) - [About](https://www.spinalcord.com/about-us) - [About Us](https://www.spinalcord.com/about-us) - [Our Team](https://www.spinalcord.com/our-team) - [Trusted By](https://www.spinalcord.com/trusted-by) - 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[Events Calendar](https://www.spinalcord.com/events) - [Podcast](https://www.spinalcord.com/sci-life-uncovered/episode-1) - Recognition - [Best of Awards](https://www.spinalcord.com/best-of-awards) - [Trusted By Designation](https://www.spinalcord.com/trusted-by-the-spinal-cord-injury-community) - [** ](tel:8773367192) - [** ](https://www.spinalcord.com/blog/wheelchair-users-what-to-do-when-people-stare#) - [** **(877) 336-7192** ](tel:8773367192) - [** **Contact Us** ](https://www.spinalcord.com/contact-us) # Wheelchair Users: What to Do When People Stare Author: [Spinal Cord Team](https://www.spinalcord.com/meet-our-authors) Publish Date: December 08, 2020 ![What to do when people stare at those in a wheelchair.](https://www.spinalcord.com/hs-fs/hubfs/Blog%20Images/wheelchair%20users%20blog%20image.png?width=724&name=wheelchair%20users%20blog%20image.png "What to do when people stare at those in a wheelchair.") I first began to notice how fascinating I had suddenly become to people during my first trip to the mall after my spinal cord injury (SCI). While before I was a nondescript 14-year-old girl — someone everyone expected to see in the mall — I was suddenly this mysterious person who couldn't walk and it boggled their minds. Everywhere I turned my head, it seemed like I caught someone staring at me. It really threw me off at first, but now, 24 years later, I've become quite adept at dealing with this behavior when [coping with a spinal cord injury](https://www.spinalcord.com/coping-with-a-spinal-cord-injury). At first, I wanted to find a place on the planet where no one would stare at me — maybe a rehab center — but that’s an impossible search. *Why do people stare?* People staring at you is because it's human nature to stare at anything different. How we deal with it is all that we can control. (Note: Intentional stares by adults that last at least 10 seconds is the staring behavior I’m talking about.) And you can take care of these hardcore starers in a handful of ways, including finding a mental state that allows you to deal with them calmly. For tips on how to deal with this #wheelchairlife symptom as cool-headed and effectively as possible, read on for what has worked for me below. ### **Option 1: Ignore It** More often than not, it’s not worth showing any emotional response to anyone that stares too long. As humans, we need to pick and choose what we expend our energy on. We shouldn’t allow strangers who annoy us to irk us because life is short and feeling anger at something you cannot stop isn't worth your time or energy. The next time you find someone staring at you, consider what else you have going on and your energy levels before reacting. ### **Option 2: Stare Right Back** If you must do something about the person staring, an easy but very effective move is to stare right back at them. It will usually make them extremely uncomfortable, often causing them to look away. By my estimations, it's a slam-dunk success about 95% of the time. When the other really rude 5% keep staring (I have been in staring matches before), it's best just to wave and move on. You always can approach them, but I’ve saved advice for that chessboard move below. ### **Option 3: Laugh and Smile** Some people won't even realize they're staring at you. When you encounter this type of person when out and about, a great way to let them know their behavior is inappropriate is to laugh and maybe roll your eyes a little bit. This condescending gesture will give them the hint that their staring games are highly inappropriate and is being construed as rude. Again, they might not care, and this is when saying something may be appropriate. ### **Option 4: Have a Quick-Witted Response at the Ready** When approaching a rude, staring person, you’ll always want an armory of quick-witted responses to smoothly respond to their non-verbal assault. A perennial favorite among wheelchair users is, “Take a picture. It’ll last longer,” but there are other funny things you can say as well. One of my personal favorites is, “Can I help you?” It’s simple, but often times it’ll really catch them off-guard. Other funny things to say to anyone staring is, “Yup. It’s a wheelchair,” “I’m not disabled, I’m just lazy,” or “Do I know you?” ### **Option 5: Take a Photo** If you want to get really dirty, you can always take a picture of them. This guarantees they will look the other way because no one wants to be shamed online, which is hopefully what they will assume you'll be doing with the photo (and you should, by the way, if they really are deserving of it). Remember, there are honest stares — stares out of pure curiosity — and then there are the stares that cross the line from adults (not kids), and go into gawk-mode. These are the types of stares that we need to deal with together as a community. Conversely, it is important for people who find themselves staring at someone who is differently-abled and don’t know how to react to learn to respond. Here are some [great tips](http://www.handicap-international.us/disability_and_staring_how_i_overcome_this_rude_behavior) from a blog that I’ve come across. *What is your preferred way to handle stares?*  [![New Call-to-action](https://no-cache.hubspot.com/cta/default/575040/d59d2232-0b56-4b13-a195-eab292389dfa.png)](https://cta-redirect.hubspot.com/cta/redirect/575040/d59d2232-0b56-4b13-a195-eab292389dfa) **Topics:** Spinal Cord Injury ### Stay Updated on Advancements On Traumatic Brain & Spinal Cord Injuries About the Author #### Spinal Cord Team The authors of Spinalcord.com are made up of attorneys, those in the medical field, and survivors of spinal cord injuries or traumatic brain injuries. Learn more about our team of authors including a brief biography that explains how they impact the SCI and TBI community. [Learn More About the Author](https://www.spinalcord.com/meet-our-authors) **Leave a Comment** [![New Call-to-action](https://no-cache.hubspot.com/cta/default/575040/dc8bc979-ba55-463a-9400-f92cbdebcb1a.png)](https://cta-redirect.hubspot.com/cta/redirect/575040/dc8bc979-ba55-463a-9400-f92cbdebcb1a) true ### Spinal Cord Injury - [Types of Spinal Cord Injuries](https://www.spinalcord.com/types-of-spinal-cord-injuries) - [Secondary Complications](https://www.spinalcord.com/secondary-complications-after-sci-spinal-cord-injury) - [Causes](https://www.spinalcord.com/signs-symptoms-of-spinal-cord-injuries) - [Symptoms](https://www.spinalcord.com/types-of-spinal-cord-injuries) - [Prognosis](https://www.spinalcord.com/prognosis-of-spinal-cord-injuries) - [Legal Help](https://www.spinalcord.com/spinal-cord-injury-legal-help-get-a-lawyer) ### Brain Injury - [Types of Brain Injuries](https://www.spinalcord.com/types-of-traumatic-brain-injury) - [Causes](https://www.spinalcord.com/causes-of-traumatic-and-acquired-brain-injuries) - [Symptoms](https://www.spinalcord.com/traumatic-brain-injury-tbi-symptoms) - [Prognosis](https://www.spinalcord.com/brain-injury-prognosis-for-tbi-abi) - [Legal Help](https://www.spinalcord.com/brain-injury-legal-help-get-a-lawyer) ### Finding Treatment - [Physician Directory](https://www.spinalcord.com/brain-and-spinal-cord-injury-physician-directory) - [Rehabilitation Directory](https://www.spinalcord.com/spinal-cord-injury-hospitals-rehabilitation-directory) - [Technology Advancements](https://www.spinalcord.com/sci-technology-advancements) - [Prevention](https://www.spinalcord.com/spinal-cord-injury-prevention) ### Legal Options - [Spinal Cord Injury Lawyer](https://www.spinalcord.com/spinal-cord-injury-lawyer) - [Brain Injury Lawyer](https://www.spinalcord.com/brain-injury-lawyer) - [Types of Personal Injury Claims](https://www.spinalcord.com/types-of-personal-injury-claims) - [Where To Start](https://www.spinalcord.com/brain-spinal-cord-injury-lawyer-where-to-start) - [Local Assistance](https://www.spinalcord.com/florida-personal-injury-claims) #### [About Us](https://www.spinalcord.com/about-us) Spinal cord injuries are traumatic for patients and their families. They cause disruptive changes to every aspect of your life and there is a lot of new information to navigate and understand. Our experts have collected everything in one place to help you learn more about your injury, locate doctors and treatment centers, find financial support, and get assistance navigating your next move. [Learn More About SpinalCord.com →](https://www.spinalcord.com/about-us) ## [Contact Us](https://www.spinalcord.com/contact-us) ![logo-footer-spinal-cord.png](https://www.spinalcord.com/hs-fs/hubfs/img/logo-footer-spinal-cord.png?width=249&name=logo-footer-spinal-cord.png "logo-footer-spinal-cord.png") **  [877-336-7192](tel:8773367192) ** [support@spinalcord.com](mailto:support@spinalcord.com) [**](https://www.facebook.com/spinalcordcom) [**](https://www.linkedin.com/company/spinalcord-com/) [**](https://twitter.com/SpinalCordCom) [**](https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAbz2AC18acXQkpMNPeDIqg) Copyright 2026 | All Rights Reserved. [Spinal Cord, Inc.](https://www.spinalcord.com) Sponsored by [Tampa personal injury lawyers](https://www.swoperodante.com/tampa-personal-injury-lawyer/) at Swope, Rodante P.A. a Florida law firm located at 1234 E 5th Ave, Tampa, FL 33605. The information provided by SpinalCord.com is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment, see [ Disclaimer Policy.](https://www.spinalcord.com/disclaimer) [**](https://www.spinalcord.com/blog/wheelchair-users-what-to-do-when-people-stare#) [**](https://www.spinalcord.com/blog/wheelchair-users-what-to-do-when-people-stare#) ```json { "@context" : "https://schema.org", "@type" : "WebSite", "name" : "Spinal Cord, Inc.", "potentialAction" : { "@type" : "SearchAction", "query-input" : "required name=search_query", "target" : "https://www.spinalcord.com/search?q={search_query}" }, "url" : "https://www.spinalcord.com/" } ``` ```json { "@context" : "https://schema.org", "@type" : "Organization", "contactPoint" : [ { "@type" : "ContactPoint", "contactType" : "customer service", "telephone" : "+1-877-336-7192" } ], "legalName" : "Spinal Cord, Inc.", "logo" : "https://www.spinalcord.com/hubfs/Logos/spinal-cord_png.png", "sameAs" : [ "https://www.facebook.com/spinalcordcom", "https://twitter.com/SpinalCordCom", "https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAbz2AC18acXQkpMNPeDIqg", "http://www.linkedin.com/company/spinalcord-com" ], "url" : "https://www.spinalcord.com/" } ``` ```json { "@context" : "http://schema.org", "@type" : "Article", "articleBody" : "The spinal cord is a vital part of the human body. As the vehicle responsible for carrying messages from the brain to the rest of the body and back again, even the smallest interference can be detrimental. Following a traumatic spinal cord injury, this bundle of nerves can become bruised, also known as a contusion. Because of the nature of the nervous system, any interference can constitute a serious spinal contusion, but these facts will help you dissect all of the information from the medical professionals.

\n\n

What Is a Spinal Contusion?

\n\"Signs-of-a-spinal-contusion-title-image\"\n

Much like any other bruise, a contusion can cause bleeding from local blood vessels and inflammation which, rather unlike bruises on other parts of the body, can have serious negative impacts on the spinal cord itself. Because the “blood must clot to stop the bleeding”a bruise results from contusions also increase cardiovascular risks.

\n

For example, the swelling a contusion can cause will often disrupt nerve impulses that travel from the brain to the body through the spinal cord, and the severity of this will depend upon the level of injury. Unlike a concussion, a contusion would not cause unconsciousness or a ‘blackout’, but instead cause the patient to feel a numbness or tingling in the extremities.

\n

A contusion can cause spinal compression, which happens when there is pressure on the spinal cord. This can go on to cause an array of physical symptoms such as loss of sensation in the feet, inability to use the hands and loss of sexual ability. It must be noted that not all contusions cause spinal compression, and not all spinal compression is caused by a contusion, although they do often connect this way.

\n

Warning Signs of a Serious Spinal Contusion to Watch For

\n

Firstly, doctors will try and establish what area or limb the injury has affected. Spinal contusions most often “affect the upper extremities bilaterally and also sometimes involve the lower extremities,” according to Dr. Wong, an orthopedic physician.

\n

Symptoms include “numbness, tingling, [or] electric shock-like sensations and burning in the extremities,” (American Association of Neurological Surgeons, 2016). Generally falling into the category of “spinal trauma” there are many symptoms which are similar to other forms of spinal trauma and spinal cord injury. Below are some symptoms of spinal trauma:

\n\n

Unfortunately, it is sometimes challenging to identify which symptoms are due to a spinal contusion, and which ones are the result of a spinal cord injury directly. It can sometimes require a few days or weeks for the body to recover from spinal trauma and reveal if any permanent damage is left from the accident that caused the SCI.

\n

Understanding what a contusion is, and how it can come into play following a spinal cord injury is important in order to clearly appreciate your injury, understand your diagnoses, and work toward treatment and a prognosis. Doctors can sometimes use jargon that’s difficult to understand, so the more you can educate yourself about your condition, the more control you can have in your recovery and treatment.

\n

If you still have questions about the details of the spinal cord and how it may be affected from your injury, please contact us or download our guide to understanding a spinal cord injury.", "author" : { "@type" : "Person", "name" : "Spinalcord.com Team" }, "datePublished" : "2020-12-03", "image" : "https://www.spinalcord.com/blog/signs-of-a-serious-spinal-contusion", "name" : "Warning Signs of a Serious Spinal Contusion", "url" : "https://www.spinalcord.com/blog/signs-of-a-serious-spinal-contusion" } ``` ```json { "@context":"https://schema.org", "@graph":[{"@type":"WebSite", "@id":"https://spinalcord.com/#website", "url":"https://www.spinalcord.com/blog/signs-of-a-serious-spinal-contusion", "name":"Spinal Cord Inc", "description":"The spinal cord is a vital part of the human body. As the vehicle responsible for carrying messages from the brain to the rest of the body and back again, even the smallest interference can be detrimental. 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Because of the nature of the nervous system, any interference can constitute a serious spinal contusion, but these facts will help you dissect all of the information from the medical professionals.", "inLanguage":"en-US"}, { "@type":"ImageObject", "@id":"Spinalcord Logo", "inLanguage":"en-US", "url":"https://www.spinalcord.com/hubfs/Logos/spinal-cord_png.png", "width":327,"height":300, "caption":"spinal contusion"}, { "@type":"WebPage","@id":"https://www.spinalcord.com/blog/signs-of-a-serious-spinal-contusion/#webpage", "url":"https://www.spinalcord.com/blog/signs-of-a-serious-spinal-contusion", "name":"Warning Signs of a Serious Spinal Contusion", "isPartOf":{"@id":"https://spinalcord.com/#website"}, "primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"www.spinalcord.com/blog/signs-of-a-serious-spinal-contusion/#primaryimage"}, "datePublished":"2020-12-03T18:30:35+00:00","dateModified":"2020-12-03T18:30:35+00:00", "author":{"@id":"https://www.spinalcord.com/meet-our-authors"}, "description":"The spinal cord is a vital part of the human body. As the vehicle responsible for carrying messages from the brain to the rest of the body and back again, even the smallest interference can be detrimental. Following a traumatic spinal cord injury, this bundle of nerves can become bruised, also known as a contusion. Because of the nature of the nervous system, any interference can constitute a serious spinal contusion, but these facts will help you dissect all of the information from the medical professionals. What Is a Spinal Contusion? Signs-of-a-spinal-contusion-title-image Much like any other bruise, a contusion can cause bleeding from local blood vessels and inflammation which, rather unlike bruises on other parts of the body, can have serious negative impacts on the spinal cord itself. Because the “blood must clot to stop the bleeding”a bruise results from contusions also increase cardiovascular risks. For example, the swelling a contusion can cause will often disrupt nerve impulses that travel from the brain to the body through the spinal cord, and the severity of this will depend upon the level of injury. Unlike a concussion, a contusion would not cause unconsciousness or a ‘blackout’, but instead cause the patient to feel a numbness or tingling in the extremities. A contusion can cause spinal compression, which happens when there is pressure on the spinal cord. This can go on to cause an array of physical symptoms such as loss of sensation in the feet, inability to use the hands and loss of sexual ability. It must be noted that not all contusions cause spinal compression, and not all spinal compression is caused by a contusion, although they do often connect this way. Warning Signs of a Serious Spinal Contusion to Watch For Firstly, doctors will try and establish what area or limb the injury has affected. Spinal contusions most often “affect the upper extremities bilaterally and also sometimes involve the lower extremities,” according to Dr. Wong, an orthopedic physician. Symptoms include “numbness, tingling, [or] electric shock-like sensations and burning in the extremities,” (American Association of Neurological Surgeons, 2016). Generally falling into the category of “spinal trauma” there are many symptoms which are similar to other forms of spinal trauma and spinal cord injury. Below are some symptoms of spinal trauma: Spinal shock — or the loss of feeling or movement below site of injury (Columbia University Medical Centre, 2016) that can last between hours and weeks Loss of bladder or bowel function Difficulty breathing Muscle spasticity Difficulty understanding speech Problems with attention Memory challenges Heart rate and blood pressure problems Unfortunately, it is sometimes challenging to identify which symptoms are due to a spinal contusion, and which ones are the result of a spinal cord injury directly. It can sometimes require a few days or weeks for the body to recover from spinal trauma and reveal if any permanent damage is left from the accident that caused the SCI. Understanding what a contusion is, and how it can come into play following a spinal cord injury is important in order to clearly appreciate your injury, understand your diagnoses, and work toward treatment and a prognosis. Doctors can sometimes use jargon that’s difficult to understand, so the more you can educate yourself about your condition, the more control you can have in your recovery and treatment. If you still have questions about the details of the spinal cord and how it may be affected from your injury, please contact us or download our guide to understanding a spinal cord injury.", "breadcrumb":{"@id":"https://www.spinalcord.com/blog/signs-of-a-serious-spinal-contusion/#breadcrumb"}, "inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https://www.spinalcord.com/blog/signs-of-a-serious-spinal-contusion"]}]}, { "@type":"BreadcrumbList", "@id":"https://www.spinalcord.com/blog/signs-of-a-serious-spinal-contusion/#breadcrumb", "itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem", "position":1, "item": { "@type":"WebPage", "@id":"https://spinalcord.com/", "url":"https://spinalcord.com/", "name":"Home"}}, {"@type":"ListItem", "position":2, "item":{"@type":"WebPage", "@id":"https://spinalcord.com/blog/", "url":"https://spinalcord.com/blog/", "name":"Articles"}}, {"@type":"ListItem", "position":3, "item":{"@type":"WebPage", "@id":"https://www.spinalcord.com/blog/signs-of-a-serious-spinal-contusion/", "url":"https://www.spinalcord.com/blog/signs-of-a-serious-spinal-contusion/", "name":"Warning Signs of a Serious Spinal Contusion"}}]}, {"@type":"Person", "@id":"https://www.spinalcord.com/meet-our-authors", "name":"Spinalcord Team", "image":{"@type":"ImageObject", "@id":"https://www.spinalcord.com/hubfs/Logos/spinal-cord_png.png", "inLanguage":"en-US", "url":"https://www.spinalcord.com/hubfs/Logos/spinal-cord_png.png", "caption":"Spinalcord Team"}, "description":"The authors at SpinalCord.com come from diverse backgrounds including doctors, attorneys, medical journalist, and survivors of spinal cord injuries or traumatic brain injuries. Each author brings with them different experiences and expertise which when combined provide clinically accurate information which is useful to all individuals in the spinal cord and traumatic brain injury communities. Within the content you will find citations to medical journals, scientific research, as well as national and local resources to provide immediate support to families in need of assistance. Content is reviewed and updated regularly with changes in the clinical guidelines, new resources, and fresh ways to understand the content such as videos and infographics. ." } ]} ```